featuring guest authors; crafting tips and projects; recipes from food editor and sleuthing sidekick Cloris McWerther; and decorating, travel, fashion, health, beauty, and finance tips from the rest of the American Woman editors.

Note: This site uses Amazon affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.

Thursday, May 5, 2016

BOOK CLUB FRIDAY--GUEST AUTHOR F.M. MEREDITH

Wife, mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother F. M. Meredith, who is also known as Marilyn Meredith, is nearing a staggering 40 published books. Though the Rocky Bluff she writes about is fictional, she lived for over twenty-years in a similar small beach town. Many of her family and friends are in law enforcement, giving her plenty of resources when researching her books. Learn more about F.M. at her website and blog. Today she joins us with some very important advice about social media in general and Facebook in particular. 

Big Mistakes People Make Using Facebook

Facebook is great! I post on it first thing in the morning and often several times during the day.

I have lots of friends and love reading what they are doing, how they think, and seeing photos of them, their children and grandchildren and their activities. However, I also see things they should never put on Facebook.

Never, never complain about your job or your co-workers and most especially not your boss. Even if your boss or none of your co-workers are your friends on Facebook, a comment you or someone else makes on the post could be sent to someone you didn’t want to see what you said. I’ve known people who’ve lost their job because of this.

The same goes for telling about your heavy drinking or picking up someone of the opposite sex, or revealing too much about your love life.  Jobs have been lost over this—the boss finds out you aren’t the person he/she thought you were.

Don’t complain about your spouse or make fun of him or her publicly unless it’s kind-hearted jesting. Even if your spouse doesn’t do Facebook, someone will be sure to tell him or her about the unflattering or demeaning remarks. Unless you want to get rid of your spouse, don’t do this.

Authors, try your best not to misspell or use bad grammar in your posts or when you’re blogging. I’ve been guilty of it—I know that even when you proofread, mistakes are overlooked. If you find something has slipped by you, fix it, or if you can’t fix it, acknowledge it.

Also for authors, don’t bad-mouth your industry professionals publicly. They all know each other and you might not have such an easy time finding a new one if you become known as a troublesome writer.

Don’t write nasty stuff about people who don’t believe the same way you do, whether it’s politics or religion. You can’t convince anyone to change to your way of thinking by a post you write on Facebook, and chances are you may alienate half your friends.

Since I put all these negative things down, here are a few things I think you should do:

Write positive posts when possible. If you’re going through hard times or going to have an operation or are sick, it’s fine to ask for prayers. I do it a lot for people, usually for relatives —though there are times it may be better not to identify the person by name.

It’s fine to tell what you’re doing, where you’re going, what’s happening while you’re there—and yes, include photos. (Anastasia stepping in here: It’s never a good idea to post where you are when you’re away from home. People have come home from vacation or a night out to find their house has been robbed because they let the world know they weren’t home.) Personally, I love to know what people are cooking or ordering in restaurants. Tell me about your kids accomplishments and the new babies that are born.

I write a lot about what I plan to do for the day because it helps me to actually do it.

Writers, I do want to hear about your new book, great reviews you’ve received, places you’re going to be for book signings and other appearances.

What kind of posts do you not like to see on Facebook?  What do you like?

Contest: Once again, the person who comments on the most blogs during this tour, can have a character named after them in the next Rocky Bluff P.D. mystery. Tomorrow you can find me here:

A Crushing Death
A pile of rocks is found on a dead body beneath the condemned pier, a teacher is accused of molesting a student, the new police chief is threatened by someone she once arrested for violent attacks on women, and Detective Milligan’s teenage daughter has a problem.

22 comments:

Marilyn Meredith a.k.a. F. M. Meredith said...

Thank you so much for hosting me today, Anastasia. And I certainly agree about not telling people when you're going to be gone if no one is going to be there. When I leave home, there's always someone at the homestead along with the dogs. One of the benefits of having a big family that lives with you or on the property, son, granddaughter and family, and great grandson and wife.

Susan Oleksiw said...

Very good advice. When I was still working and email, etc., was relatively new, I always told staff members not to post anything they didn't want to see on the front page of a newspaper. Nothing is private on the Internet. Thanks for sharing your list of dos and don'ts.

M.M. Gornell said...

All good advice, Marilyn!

Marilyn Meredith a.k.a. F. M. Meredith said...

Hi Susan, i am appalled at what I see some people write. And unfortunately, it does at times change my opinion of them.

And M.M. thanks for you comment.

Radine Trees Nehring g said...

Thanks for sharing this Marilyn. Amazing that too many don't think of these things. Radine

Marilyn Meredith a.k.a. F. M. Meredith said...

Thanks for stopping by, Radine, I thought it was a timely topic.

Elaine Faber said...

I like to cruise the web and when I find a really amazing video or story and particularly if its about a black and white cat (like the protag in my cat mysteries), I share it on my page. Because we have so many sad things in our life, I'm hoping to give someone a smile or a good thought for the day.

Jan Christensen said...

Great list, Marilyn. I also liked the glimpse into how you get on Facebook every morning and post something. I need to adopt that idea.

Marilyn Meredith a.k.a. F. M. Meredith said...

Elaine, I agree, I like the uplifting and humorous things best, Oh, sure, I like to be kept up on the breaking news, but the gruesome stuff about animals and kids are not how I want to spend my day. Yes, I know it happens, but....

And Jan, I do use Facebook kind of like my "to-do" list or motivation for the day.

Haggerty said...

Marilyn, I agree with most of what you said, but I must confess I do respond to some of the political posts. Some of the posts are out and out lies while others are so hateful it's hard not to respond. I certainly have lost a few people I friended and I have unfriended a few myself. Whether or not anybody has changed their minds about my comments or posts, I can't say, but to say nothing goes against my beliefs in this country and my fellow police officers.

Susan Tuttle said...

I agree wholeheartedly, Marilyn, with everything you've said. I never post anything that's negative. It's scary how easily we forget that once it's on the net, it's there forever. I would never post anything I would not say to someone's face. And since I alway try to be kind, sympathetic and diplomatic to even those I don't get along with, I end up silent about anything that really bugs me. As my mother always told me, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." I've tried to make that my motto, so I stick to my writing and editing and the good, happy, fun stuff that goes on in my life. There's enough hatred in this world without adding to it or helping it go viral!

The only posts I really dislike are the political ones. Any of them. I wish I knew how to delete them all off my Facebook site. It's probably because I don't have a political bone in my body, but politics and I inhabit two different dimensions, and I hope that anyone who comes to my Facebook page realizes that all political posts are from someone else who didn't ask permission to post them. Sigh...

Thanks for another great post, Marilyn!

Angela Adams said...

Great, and helpful, post. Thank you.

Anonymous said...

I do not like political rants. It doesn't matter if I agree or disagree. As for authors, it's best to balance the promo posts with social, helpful ones.

Marilyn Meredith a.k.a. F. M. Meredith said...

Thanks for your ost, Angela!

And Maggie, I so agree. I do both things on my own blog and host many authors.

Kathleen Kaska said...

Marilyn, Thanks for posting this. I agree 100 percent1 Politics, religion, ranting ad raving, and posting photo on bodily injuries is not what I want to read and view.

Marilyn Meredith a.k.a. F. M. Meredith said...

Joe, I didn't get a chance to respond to your post yet, I don't like a lot of what I read, but I seldom say anything.

I'm more or less on the same track with you, Susan. Often the less said, the better.

And kathleen, another who agrees with me. Thank you all for posting.

Sandra Parshall said...

Facebook now has 1.65 billion active users around the world. It's the most powerful communications metwork on Earth. It's been used to start a revolution, to track down criminals, to find missing children, to organize protests, to expose wrongdoing of every variety. It's a little unrealistic to expect everybody on FB to post only cute pet photos and pleasant chat. I like the wide variety of users and their vastly diverse interests. I'm an intensely political person, I care passionately about who runs my country, and I enjoy fact-based political discussion. People who don't like what I post can unfriend me or hide my posts. I won't miss them and I'll never know they aren't reading my posts. If I did know, I wouldn't care. We are all different, and I don't want to shove anything in anyone's face. I have unfriended a legion of people but somehow still have almost 5,000 on my list. We are all free to read or not read whatever we please. There's no need -- and it's utterly useless, in any case -- to try to tell others what to post. That is a personal decision for each individual to make.

Marilyn Meredith a.k.a. F. M. Meredith said...

Sandra, you do indeed have the right to post whatever you want. My big point here is I"m not going to argue with you if I don't agree--and since I don't like people arguing with me I'm not going to post much that's controversial. I don't unfriend people either if I don't agree with them, the only ones I unfriend are those who put up disgusting posts.

I love your passion, Sandra, though I don't always agree with you--and obviously you didn't agree with me on most of what I put in my post. No problem, I certainly respect you for being honest.

Sharon Ervin said...

Great pointers and advice for posting on Facebook. I don't do it nearly enough to benefit. Good nudge.

Holli Castillo said...

I'm always amazed at the people who bad-mouth their boss or job. Facebook may seem like a friendly, intimate gathering of your 1500 closest friends, but it is not. And it is definitely not the same as confiding about your incompetent boss or dead-end job to your BFF or mom.

I occasionally will buy a book from what I've seen on a FB post, especially if it's not a needy please-buy-my-book post, but a post that reveals just enough about the book that I can tell I would be interested in it (Marilyn excels at this!) I will admit I try more local restaurants and different dishes more often from FB posts than I find new books to read, but that's probably because there are a lot more great books on my TBR list than there are restaurants and food on my To Be Eaten list.

ANASTASIA POLLACK said...

Another word of caution concerning FB: a few years ago a cyber forensics expert mentioned to me that FB is one of the easiest sites to hack. Many adolescents with some computer experience have hacked FB. Just because you have all your privacy settings in place, there's no guarantee your info will remain private if the wrong person gets hold of it.

Marilyn Meredith a.k.a. F. M. Meredith said...

Thanks for you comment, Sharon, and the compliment Holli! And Anastasia for adding the extra warning.