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Friday, August 18, 2023

GRAMMAR PET PEEVE: I VS. ME

When the cat’s away, the mice will play. And when my author Lois Winston is off at a writing conference, I, the eponymous reluctant amateur sleuth of her Anastasia Pollack Crafting Mystery Series, have decided I need a break. So instead of tracking down a guest author for today’s blog post, I’ve gone into Lois’s files and taken a guest post she wrote about a year and a half ago for author Kathleen Kaska. (After all, this is supposed to be my blog, not Lois’s, right?) In this post Lois was on a rant about grammar. I can’t say that I blame her. I feel the same way about the use of “I” and “me,” but I suppose that’s because everything about me springs from Lois’s mind. Anyway, without further ado, here it is:

I vs. Me

By Lois Winston

 

Peggy Riley Hughes, my seventh and eighth grade English teacher, was a grammar martinet. Her weapon of choice was a yardstick which she slammed against the blackboards that lined the front and one side of our classroom, metaphorically beating grammar rules into her students. As a result, those blackboards were pockmarked with tiny gouges. Rumor had it that she once shattered one of those blackboards. Occasionally, her yardstick would even come down on the desk of a clueless student. If you had Peggy Riley Hughes for English, you learned grammar—one way or another.

 

In My Fair Lady, Henry Higgins laments, “Why can’t the English teach their children how to speak?” Not a day goes by that I don’t think of that song and Peggy Riley Hughes. I may no longer remember the names of all the parts of speech or parts of a sentence, but I remember the rules Mrs. Hughes drummed into us. And I cringe every time I see or hear certain ones being broken.

 

I’ll be the first to admit I lost my reverence for the OED when they declared it was acceptable to split infinitives. Do you have any idea the reaming out I would have gotten had I dared to split an infinitive on a writing assignment?

 

But the breaking of the grammar rule that bugs me the most is when I see or hear a nominative pronoun being used in the objective case. For those of you who didn’t have a Peggy Riley Hughes in your life, the nominative case is the subject of a sentence. It’s where you use I, he, she, and they. The objective case is when a noun or pronoun is used as the object of the sentence. For pronouns, that’s me, him, her, and them. It’s the direct or indirect object of the sentence or the object in a prepositional phrase.

 

Putting it simply, you wouldn’t say, “He’s going with I” or “Jack drove she to the store.” You’d say, “He’s going with me” or “Jack drove her to the store.” So why would you say, “He’s going with Anna and I” or “Jack drove she and I to the store”? When you think about it, it makes no sense.

 

Yet I see the nominative being used in place of the objective in just about every book I’ve read for years now. It doesn’t matter if it’s a first-time indie-published author or a multi-published New York Times bestselling author from a major publishing house. Maybe schools aren’t teaching grammar anymore, but wouldn’t you think editors would be schooled in proper grammar usage?

 

I admit, this is one of my major pet peeves. In the greater scheme of life, I suppose it’s a minor one, but it’s like fingernails on a blackboard when I read or hear an “I,” “she,” “he,” or “they” when it’s supposed to be a “me,” “her,” “him” or “them.” Maybe it’s a bit of PTSD from all those whacks of the yardstick from back in my junior high days.


What's your grammar pet peeve? Post a comment for a chance to win a promo code for a free audiobook of Scrapbook of Mystery, the sixth book in the Anastasia Pollack Crafting Mystery Series.

21 comments:

Vera Day said...

My grammar pet peeve is writers and news anchors mixing up bad and badly, but Merriam-Webster says my pet peeve is fuddy-duddy nowadays.

Lois Winston said...

I think I'm fighting a losing battle as well, Vera! Thanks for stopping by and commenting.

Morgan Mandel said...

When someone writes their, which is possessive, when they really mean to say they are, which should be they're.

Lois Winston said...

That's certainly another common one, Morgan. Thanks for stopping by!

Kassandra Lamb said...

Or worse yet, when they mix the pronouns. Jack drove him and I to the store. *shudder*

Lois Winston said...

Yes, Kass. There's no logic to it. Thanks for stopping by!

Anonymous said...

Could care less when the writer means couldn’t care less. Also,I’m so old school,I can’t get used to substituting their for him or her, yet I see it everywhere.

DebbieRae said...

My pet peeves are "I seen it," and issues with apostrophes. I have three cat's! (Three cat's whats? Toys? Hairballs?). I am also a firm believer in the Oxford comma.

Lois Winston said...

I hear you, Anonymous. It does become confusing. Times change, and sometimes it takes a while to catch up, especially for us old school grammarians.

Lois Winston said...

DebbieRae, that apostrophe really bugs me when people have a sign on their house stating, “The Smith’s” The Smith’s what?

Ellen said...

One of my pet peeves, and I have several, is when people say: "I took myself and my son to the store". Why do people refer to themselves as 'myself'?

Lois Winston said...

Excellent question, Ellen! I wish I knew the answer. Thanks for stopping by and commenting.

traveler said...

I have many pet peeves. I was educated in the 1950's when grammar and sentence structure was important. It grates on me how people speak, write or don't know how to write and compose a sentence and thought anymore. #1. Most importantly - never used correctly or used at all. Your, your're. Double negatives. Affect and effect use improperly. Who and whom. Lose and loose. etc.

Sandra Benson said...

I read cringeworthy real estate and vacation rental ads daily. My favourite is the assertion that a property is decorated with “flare”. It widens? It’s on fire?

Now that I think of it, I often see this misused in food blogs. I suppose if one is referencing a grilled steak it might work.

Saralyn said...

I hear loads of young people saying, "Me and Rodney went to the concert." Where did this come from? I"m a former English teacher, quite a stickler, though without the yardstick. Split infinitives still annoy me, and I even catch editors in mistakes. Grammar is very much like mathematics. There are rules that apply to words instead of numbers, and breaking the rules results in unsuccessful sentences. Thanks for the rant. I'm with you all the way!

Marion Deland said...

The one that bugs me most is "like" instead of "as if." I've had people correct my sentences to "like." I've had to use it intentionally in dialog, because it's become common usage and "as if" can make the speaker sound prim. (Do I?)

Also "different from" vs. "different than."

Lois Winston said...

Traveler, I guess we're just dinosaurs fighting a losing battle.

Sandra, maybe they set up flares around the house to attract buyers? ;-)

Saralynn, I can't remember the last time I read a book that didn't contain at least one typo. Most have many more, and it doesn't matter whether the book is indie published or from a large traditional publishing house.

Marion, my pet peeve regarding like is the way people pepper their conversations with it ad nauseam.

Thank you all for stopping by and responding!

Unknown said...

The I vs. Me makes me nuts, too. "Me and my friends are going to the mall." AARGH.

Leslie said...

Lie and lay--between you and I--I feel badly--every book I read now has these "errors". I guess it's really a losing battle.

Lois Winston said...

I'm afraid so, Leslie.

Lois Winston said...

Unknown, AARGH is right!