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Thursday, December 30, 2010


Today we’re back with author Lois Winston in our continuing celebration of the January 1st release of ASSAULT WITH A DEADLY GLUE GUN, the book about me.  -- AP

Thanks, Anastasia. Being New Year’s Eve, I doubt we have many people dropping by Killer Crafts & Crafty Killers today.

You’d be surprised how many people would rather spend a few minutes with me rather than get all dressed up and party the night away. Besides, be honest. When was the last time you really enjoyed yourself going out on New Year’s Eve? All that noise. The crowds. And the food is usually sub-standard, even at the best restaurants. 

You have a point.

Of course, I do. It’s much more relaxing to curl up with a  good book -- or in this case, a good blog. Light a fire in the fireplace; make some hot chocolate. What could be better? It’s not like either of us would traipse into the city to freeze our buns off for hours with a million tourists as they wait for that crystal ball to drop. You get a better view on TV. Plus, we’ve got bathroom facilities. They don’t.

True. I always wondered how they all held it in so long. Especially in the cold.


On what?

Proper noun: Depends.


So how about we give our readers another look into my crazy family? I think it’s time to introduce my multi-married Mama.

Great idea! From last week’s excerpt, I’m sure it became apparent that Mama and Lucille, my mother-in-law, don’t exactly see eye-to-eye. Lucille is the president of the Greater New York area chapter of The Daughters of the October Revolution. Mama, a life-long member and past social secretary of the Daughters of the American Revolution, is convinced my mother-in-law is plotting to overthrow the government. Considering the total membership
of The Daughters of the October Revolution consisted of thirteen semi-crippled female octogenarians, I find the threat negligible.  Mama believes otherwise.

The other thing about Mama is that she hasn’t had the best of luck when it comes to husbands…


Flora Sudberry Periwinkle Ramirez Scoffield Goldberg O’Keefe had a knack for losing husbands.  With Seamus gone, she was fast approaching Liz Taylor territory.  In truth, Mama didn’t lose them so much as they wound up dying on her in a succession of odd circumstances.  My own father had drowned while scuba diving in the Yucatan on their twenty-fifth anniversary.  

A year and a half later, Mama remarried.  Husband Number Two, an adventure-seeking daredevil, lasted four months before the bulls gored him to death as he raced through the streets of Pamplona.  

Number Three made it to their first anniversary.  Barely.  Highly allergic to shellfish and having forgotten to bring along his epinephrine, he asphyxiated after inhaling the aroma from a sizzling platter of shrimp that a waiter carried past their table. 
Number Four lost his footing at the Grand Canyon and plunged to his death during their honeymoon.  

So now Mama was once again widowed.  A temporary situation. Mama was the kind of woman who needed a man.  And whenever Mama was between husbands, she came to stay with us. 

(end of excerpt)

If you want to read more about Mama, Lucille, and the rest of the motley crew that live within the pages of ASSAULT WITH A DEADLY GLUE GUN, the wait is over. Booksellers across the country should be placing them on store shelves as you read this, if they haven’t already. Amazon and other cyber-bookstores have had the book available for several weeks.

And if you’re feeling lucky, in celebration of the release of ASSAULT WITH A DEADLY GLUE GUN, I’m doing a blog tour throughout January and will be giving away 5 copies. All you have to do to enter is post a comment on any of the guest blog posts. You can find the schedule on my website, http://www.loiswinston.com, and here on the Killer Crafts & Crafty Killers sidebar. (If your email isn’t included in your comment, email me privately at lois@loiswinston.com to let me know you’ve entered.)

In addition, I’m also giving away a collection of crafts books at several of the blogs, including this one. Post a comment here today to be entered in the drawing. The winner will be posted Sunday, so be sure to check back to see if you’ve won.

Thanks for having me here today, Anastasia. And Happy New Year, everyone!


Joanna Aislinn said...

Happy New Year to both of you! And Lois, enjoy that blog tour--looking forward to some of the stops myself :)

Joanna Aislinn
Dream. Believe. Strive. Achieve!
The Wild Rose Press


Thanks, Joanna! Happy New Year to you, too!

Anonymous said...

Happy New Year Lois.
Love the book title.
Can I get it for my Kindle?
cmr (chrisreddingauthor at yahoo dot com)

Marian Pearson Stevens said...

Happy New Year Lois! The book sounds like a hoot! Congrats on the release!

Marian at MarianPearsonStevens dot com

Lois Winston said...

Hi Chris! Yes, ASSAULT WITH A DEAD GLUE GUN is available for Kindle. Click on the book cover on the sidebar, and it will take you right to the Amazon page.

Happy New Year to you too, Marian! And thanks for the congrats.

Kathleen Ernst said...

Congrats on the new release! I predict 2011 will be a wonderful year for Anastasia.

J K Maze said...

With the temperatures in my area (Twin Cities, Minnesota) plummeting from above normal to nearly zero, I'm staying in and writing, reading, including this blog, and thoroughly enjoying myself.

The excerpt is intriguing. I ambsolutely must read your book. It's practially, or maybe is, a do or die situation.

Joan K. Maze

jeff7salter said...

The Mama character does indeed sound like a real hoot.
Eager to read this book / series.
Happy New Year, Lois.

Lois Winston said...

Thanks Joan! Sounds like a great way to spend New Year's Eve. Enjoy!

Thanks, Jeff! Happy New Year to you, too!

Unknown said...

Ahh, Depends sales go up in NYC today. That explains a lot. :) Hoping the toddlers at the family party I'm going to tonight won't be trying to break any decibel limits laws tonight!

C.C. Wiley said...

Happy New Year! I just finished reading the excerpt and now have your new release waiting to drop into my Kindle. A great way to start my new year!

Lois Winston said...

Yes, Janel, I bet Duane Reades does a booming business in Depends today. Hopefully those toddlers will fall asleep early. Enjoy the party!

C.C., thanks so much for purchasing the Kindle version. Hope you enjoy it!

Cathy Shouse said...

I'm looking forward to your new series. I "met" you from going to DD's site. I learned more about your series in Andrea Campbell's Soup's On newsletter.
Love the beginning excerpt. Best of luck with the book.

Please enter me in the contest.

cathy underscore shouse at yahoo

Lois Winston said...

Hi Cathy! So glad you stopped by and enjoyed the excerpt. You can read more of the chapter at my website -- http://www.loiswinston.com.

Irene said...

What a mom! What a great life! What a good story! I laughed so hard at just this excerpt, the whole book will have me in stitches.

Lois Winston said...

Thanks so much, Irene! It's always good to laugh!